Codependency

Understanding codependency, Your Self Awareness, Learning to Parent Yourself, Learning to Validate your emotions, trauma, whether you’re highly sensitive or overly emotional.

UNTANGLING YOURSELF-from Others, Owning the emotion & Getting to know yourself by Loving yourself with compassion. Codependents get themselves entangled in other people’s problems trying to fix, control, rescue, give advice, or force solutions on people who often don’t want or may need change. These behaviors, although meaning well, are frustrating for everyone involved. We get frustrated because we usually can’t affect change. Focusing on other people’s problems  distracts us from owning our part in the problems & changing ourselves. These controlling & rescuing behaviors strain relationships. Loved ones resent our demanding & ultimatums. Our emotions may also be dependent on other people’s feelings. It might be that when your Other is in a good mood, you’re in a good mood and when they’re in a bad mood, you are in a bad mood. You may have difficulty recognizing your own feelings; you’ve become detached from yourself because you’re constantly concerned about how other people feel. We can untangle ourselves from others by learning to detach with love and stop enabling. Detaching is similar to setting healthy boundaries. Detaching puts healthy emotional, physical space between you & Others, so you & the Other have freedom to make your own choices, & have your own feelings. Detaching can include leaving uncomfortable, unsafe situations, saying “no”, or refraining yourself from giving advice.

Reflection: Do you enable, tangle yourself up in other people’s lives or problems? What boundaries will help you detach, prioritize your needs? How do you feel? .

OWNING YOUR PART- Denial is a self-protective measure that we use to deal with our overwhelming pain. Denial tries to shield us from our anger, despair, shame, it becomes a barrier to changing codependent patterns. We struggle to own our part in dysfunctional relationships, we tend to blame others. When we blame others, we act like victims, putting our happiness on whether other people will change. Gaining awareness means accepting responsibility, but not assuming responsibility for what other adults do. You aren’t responsible for others decisions. You are responsible for your happiness, health, which means you have choices and can take charge.

Reflection: If you’re having trouble seeing a situation objectively, do you have a trusted friend who can help see things from a different perspective? Do you blame others for your unhappiness? Can you empower yourself , solving your problems?

KNOWING YOURSELF– codependent families prevents us from developing a understanding of ourselves. Fear is used to force us to conform to family norms & we weren’t allowed or encouraged to explore our own interests,  beliefs during childhood. We learn to suppress who we are to please others. In adulthood, we stay  or focus on other people,  that we really don’t know who we are, what we like, or what we want. We become defined by our roles, instead of the complex individuals that we are. Codependency recovering has to include getting to know ourselves.Getting to know ourselves isn’t selfish, its healthy & respect for ourselves. It means that we care about ourselves, we are curious about who we are.

Reflection: What do you like to do? How do you like to be treated? What are your goals? What do you believe?

LOVE YOURSELF– We do this through COMPASSION, accepting imperfections & mistakes, self care & Self-love, being kind to yourself, instead of being critical about your flaws. Self-love is your basic physical need,  getting sleep, eating healthy food, exercise, taking medications your doctor has prescribed,  setting boundaries, your opinions, asking for what you need, making time for fun, social connection. If you’re not used to taking care of yourself, it will feel uncomfortable for a while, but with each step of compassion, self-care, you are taking solid steps to love yourself.

Reflection: What is one thing you can do for your emotional health everyday? What is one thing you can do for your physical health everyday? What are you saying to yourself when you make mistakes? What can you tell yourself that would be understanding, supportive & compassionate?

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Meditation

Concentration meditation Our consciousness focus on a object or subject and breathing deeply, this helps form mental acuity, focus, and application. It helps in overcoming distraction & will build patience.
Open awareness Meditation encourages us to observe,  be present in the consciousness at the moment, resting in awareness without boundary or guidance.
Open-awareness meditation is the metaphor of the mind being an open sky.
Mindfulness Meditation is about focus but to remain aware,  aware of sensory & perception, as well as emotion & thought, accepting of our entire experience.
Happy Meditating!
Sit or lie comfortably on a chair, cushion, Playlist calming sounds, music or silence, etc
Close your eyes
 Simply breathe naturally.
Be clear on your motivation for meditating
Take it one day at a time
Stay mindful after meditations on daily basis
Meditation is a journey of a lifetime, be confident about what you’re doing & explore your different areas and emotions of life.
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All meditations are simply different, Its Fascinating to explore these ancient practices,  it’s worth pursuing.

 

 

Zenagallery-Astrology, Spiritual Healing Arts & Angelic Oracle READINGS

Hello Everyone! Making the Connection to your Inner Dreams, Have you ever wondered how? Welcome to Zenagallery. Who Am I ?  A Firm Believer A Woman of GOD. Ms. Zena, Mental Health Specialist of NY Developmental Disabilities State Operations. ZENA is Intuitive em-path Spiritual Messenger, Healer, Light worker. A certified Astrologer with the The Circle of Light Spiritual Center of Western New York. Zena is Virgo Woman Rising Leo. I Zena, Serve & Support Clients to Discover or Rediscover Light, Love, Inspiration, Soul Sessions, Healing, Positive Energy to help with Individual Awareness of Self, Attain your Highest Level of Ascension. I Ms. Zena Specializing in Personal Readings, Special Divine Messages, Birth Charts, Crystals, Energy, Light, Love, Readings, Positivity, Healing, Manifesting Heart Fulfillment, Spirituality, Awaken Your Soul, Gratitude, Relaxation, Communication, Success,  Inspiration, Happiness, Astrology, Birth Charts, & Much More….Just Ask ! & I’ll Answer!! Email zenagalleryoracle@gmail.com20192

Healthy Meals, Diets, Easy & Cheap

 

plantfood
Plant based Healthy, Easy, Inexpensive Meals

Burrito bowls, Tacos, Other bowls, Veggie Bowls, Rice bowls
Lentil burgers , Chickpea curry dish
A quinoa- or brown rice- lunch
Spaghetti
Pastas beyond spaghetti
Tofu vegetable stir-fry
Veggie-stuffed tacos
Veggie chili
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Traditional Asian Foods & Veggies, Ornish diet, Mediterranean-diet, vegetarian diet , flexitarian diet , Best Plant diets to lower your weight, blood pressure and to possibly prevent chronic diseases.
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Pelvic Exam?! Pap Smear?! Gynecological

Stage of Cervical cancer. Education info graphic vector.

PELVIC Exam vs PAP SMEAR. Pap smear and pelvic examination are common gynecological procedures done both at the office level and hospitals.

PAP SMEAR is done at well-women clinics, to screen for cervical cancer. Pap smear is a screening test to detect cervical cancer. A pap smear yields a sample for examination under the microscope. Pap smear is targeted more towards prevention.

PELVIC EXAM is thorough examination where all the features of the female reproductive system are analyzed. The gynecologist will examine the vagina,  Cervix, adnexa, uterine size, and other palpable abnormalities are assessed. Pelvic exam is a clinical examination protocol. Pelvic examination is a diagnostic procedure that can be altered according to the clinician’s need. Pelvic examination is a more of a diagnostic procedure.

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Resentment?!

Feeling angry, resentful about things that happened or didn’t happen?!
Resentment is like a cancer. Tips to reduce resentments to live a happier life. Think loving positive thoughts for your personal resentment. The opposite of anger, hate, fear? is love. By sending LOVE towards others. Praying that they receive all the wonderful things you want for yourself in life, you slowly turn away at negative emotions that do you harm.  Try and work at it.
Believe in prayer,  set aside time during the day to think loving thoughts. Wishing others good fortune and blessings. Say it out loud. GOD please give love, health and peace to others and myself to let any resentment go.
At first it will likely feel awkward and meaningless,  difficult. It could take weeks, months, or even years, but eventually you’ll notice where there were once ill feelings. But now there is peace, love and that you start to actually mean it.
Check your motives and expectations, the best way to eliminate resentment is, not to set yourself up for it. For example, think about when people ask you to do things for them. You probably form expectations about what they’ll do for you in return. If there’s a hint of what’s in it for me, chances are you’re headed for some resentment. Be Grateful. A heart that is full of gratitude has little room for resentment.  Whenever I’m feeling stressed, resentful, or angry, I put my pen to paper and write down  things I’m grateful for in that moment.
It’s difficult to resent what you don’t have when you’re focusing your energy on what you do have. Stay open to different outcomes.
The key to finding happiness is realizing that you already possess everything you need to be happy. When you realize happiness is an inside job, you’re less likely to place demands on other people and situations.
Reducing resentment takes practice and mindfulness. Being mindful, I recognized this and removed myself from unhealthy situations.
I asked for acceptance, guidance. Years from now, what will I remember the most.
We all have the ability to manage expectations, change our state of mind, and ultimately be happy regardless of how we expect things will unfold. Don’t let your demons  introduce you to hell, Introduce your demons to Heaven. May peace be with you!
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Healing Emotional/Rejection Pain?!

We can try Healing Emotional Pain by letting go of rejection, rejection activates the same pathways in your brain as physical pain, which is a reason why it hurts. If we avoid ruminating, we can start turning failure Into Something Positive. Especially if We can make sure our Guilt remains as useful Emotions. If you have low self esteem be sure to use Self-Affirmations A lot. Healing Emotional Pain takes time. Rejection plays with your need to belong, it is distressing, it interferes with your ability to think, memories and making decisions. The sooner you let go of painful rejections, the better off your mind will be. Ruminate, or brood, over past hurts, the memories you replay in your mind become increasingly distressing and cause Anger, without providing any new insights.

In other words, while reflecting on a painful event, it actually can help you to reach an understanding or closure about it. Ruminating simply increases your stress levels, and can actually be addictive, ruminating on stressful incidents can also increase your levels of C-reactive protein, a marker of inflammation in the body linking to diseases.

Turn Failure Into Positive. Don’t Allow yourself to feel helpless after a failure, or blame it on your lack of ability or bad luck, it’s likely to lower your self-esteem. Blaming a failure on specific factors within your control, such as planning and execution, is likely to be less damaging. What’s even better is,  focusing on ways you can improve, Work on  being better  Informed or Prepared so you can succeed next time.

Use Guilt as a Useful Emotion, Guilt can be beneficial, it can stop you from doing something that may harm another person. Guilt that lingers or is excessive,  can impair your ability to focus & hinder you from enjoying Life.
If you still feel guilty after apologizing for a wrongdoing, be sure you have expressed empathy toward them and conveyed that you understand how your actions impacted them. This will lead to authentic forgiveness, relief of guilty feelings.

Self Positive affirmations are excellent tools for emotional health, if they fall outside the boundaries of your beliefs, they may be ineffective. This may be the case for people with low self-esteem, for whom self-affirmations may be more useful. Self-affirmations, such as “I have a great work ethic, I am a Hard worker,” can help your positive qualities you believe you have. Make a list of your Best Qualities. Healing emotional/rejection Pain. May Peace be with you.

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5 Benefits of Working Out in the Morning — General Health Magazine

Hotly debated fitness topics are in no short supply: yoga vs. pilates, cardio vs. strength training, and the treadmill vs. outdoor running. But no dispute is as polarizing as the one surrounding morning vs. evening workouts. Of course, the absolute best time to work out is whenever gym time meshes with your schedule so actually show up on the […]

via 5 Benefits of Working Out in the Morning — General Health Magazine

Winter Blues Seasonal Affective Disorder

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Every winter the way we may feel, seasonal affective disorder or SAD. During winter months with less sunlight in addition to a depressed mood, sad, includes cravings for carbs, inability to concentrate, irritability, weight gain etc. Sunlight stops melatonin production in the body, and darkness starts it.

Sunlight is usually missing in the winter months, when light is absent, the pineal gland activates two of its natural enzymes to turn the hormone serotonin into melatonin. Serotonin keeps us from being depressed, stops craving sweets & carbs. when melatonin kicks in, normal serotonin activities are reversed, the pineal gland gets insufficient sunlight.

Dietary Remedies: Apricots,apples, pears, grapes, plums, grapefruits, oranges , Avocados, Brown Rice, dates, bananas, papayas, plantains, pineapple, tomatoes, cottage cheese, turkey, fish ,eggs, ice, shellfish.

Herbal: Teas  Chamomile, peppermint, cinnamon

Lifestyle Remedies: Curtains Open, Exercise in the Sun outside or near a sunny window, walking, aerobics, swimming, biking, light therapy, vacation in sunny climate during winter months