Let’s begin with all the questions! “Mercury is in retrograde,” what does that even mean?! And what is a Christian woman doing poking around astrology? Does your husband know? How about your pastor? (LOL, this being the internet those threats to notify my husband or my pastor are often followed up by rather intimate photos […]
1. “I Love Myself for Who I Am.”
2. “I Am Strong and Capable.”
3. “How I Feel Matters.”
4. “I Allow Myself to Be in Only Healthy Relationships.”
5. “I Choose to Forgive and Let Go of Anger.”
6. “I Choose to Let Go of My Fear.”
7. “I Will Come Through This Challenge With a Better Understanding of Myself.”
8. “I Deserve Happiness.”
9. “I Take the Time to Care for My Body, Mind, and Spirit.”
Exercise, Eat healthy, Spend time doing things you enjoy, Get sleep, Take care of your Spirituality, Don’t trap yourself thinking you’re “too busy” to take care of yourself.
2 Peter 3 King James Version (KJV)
3 This second epistle, beloved, I now write unto you; in both which I stir up your pure minds by way of remembrance:
2 That ye may be mindful of the words which were spoken before by the holy prophets, and of the commandment of us the apostles of the Lord and Saviour:
3 Knowing this first, that there shall come in the last days scoffers, walking after their own lusts,
4 And saying, Where is the promise of his coming? for since the fathers fell asleep, all things continue as they were from the beginning of the creation.
5 For this they willingly are ignorant of, that by the word of God the heavens were of old, and the earth standing out of the water and in the water:
6 Whereby the world that then was, being overflowed with water, perished:
7 But the heavens and the earth, which are now, by the same word are kept in store, reserved unto fire against the day of judgment and perdition of ungodly men.
8 But, beloved, be not ignorant of this one thing, that one day is with the Lord as a thousand years, and a thousand years as one day.
9 The Lord is not slack concerning his promise, as some men count slackness; but is longsuffering to us-ward, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance.
10 But the day of the Lord will come as a thief in the night; in the which the heavens shall pass away with a great noise, and the elements shall melt with fervent heat, the earth also and the works that are therein shall be burned up.
11 Seeing then that all these things shall be dissolved, what manner of persons ought ye to be in all holy conversation and godliness,
12 Looking for and hasting unto the coming of the day of God, wherein the heavens being on fire shall be dissolved, and the elements shall melt with fervent heat?
13 Nevertheless we, according to his promise, look for new heavens and a new earth, wherein dwelleth righteousness.
14 Wherefore, beloved, seeing that ye look for such things, be diligent that ye may be found of him in peace, without spot, and blameless.
15 And account that the longsuffering of our Lord is salvation; even as our beloved brother Paul also according to the wisdom given unto him hath written unto you;
16 As also in all his epistles, speaking in them of these things; in which are some things hard to be understood, which they that are unlearned and unstable wrest, as they do also the other scriptures, unto their own destruction.
17 Ye therefore, beloved, seeing ye know these things before, beware lest ye also, being led away with the error of the wicked, fall from your own stedfastness.
18 But grow in grace, and in the knowledge of our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ. To him be glory both now and for ever. Amen.
Understanding codependency, Your Self Awareness, Learning to Parent Yourself, Learning to Validate your emotions, trauma, whether you’re highly sensitive or overly emotional.
UNTANGLING YOURSELF-from Others, Owning the emotion & Getting to know yourself by Loving yourself with compassion. Codependents get themselves entangled in other people’s problems trying to fix, control, rescue, give advice, or force solutions on people who often don’t want or may need change. These behaviors, although meaning well, are frustrating for everyone involved. We get frustrated because we usually can’t affect change. Focusing on other people’s problems distracts us from owning our part in the problems & changing ourselves. These controlling & rescuing behaviors strain relationships. Loved ones resent our demanding & ultimatums. Our emotions may also be dependent on other people’s feelings. It might be that when your Other is in a good mood, you’re in a good mood and when they’re in a bad mood, you are in a bad mood. You may have difficulty recognizing your own feelings; you’ve become detached from yourself because you’re constantly concerned about how other people feel. We can untangle ourselves from others by learning to detach with love and stop enabling. Detaching is similar to setting healthy boundaries. Detaching puts healthy emotional, physical space between you & Others, so you & the Other have freedom to make your own choices, & have your own feelings. Detaching can include leaving uncomfortable, unsafe situations, saying “no”, or refraining yourself from giving advice.
Reflection: Do you enable, tangle yourself up in other people’s lives or problems? What boundaries will help you detach, prioritize your needs? How do you feel? .
OWNING YOUR PART- Denial is a self-protective measure that we use to deal with our overwhelming pain. Denial tries to shield us from our anger, despair, shame, it becomes a barrier to changing codependent patterns. We struggle to own our part in dysfunctional relationships, we tend to blame others. When we blame others, we act like victims, putting our happiness on whether other people will change. Gaining awareness means accepting responsibility, but not assuming responsibility for what other adults do. You aren’t responsible for others decisions. You are responsible for your happiness, health, which means you have choices and can take charge.
Reflection: If you’re having trouble seeing a situation objectively, do you have a trusted friend who can help see things from a different perspective? Do you blame others for your unhappiness? Can you empower yourself , solving your problems?
KNOWING YOURSELF– codependent families prevents us from developing a understanding of ourselves. Fear is used to force us to conform to family norms & we weren’t allowed or encouraged to explore our own interests, beliefs during childhood. We learn to suppress who we are to please others. In adulthood, we stay or focus on other people, that we really don’t know who we are, what we like, or what we want. We become defined by our roles, instead of the complex individuals that we are. Codependency recovering has to include getting to know ourselves.Getting to know ourselves isn’t selfish, its healthy & respect for ourselves. It means that we care about ourselves, we are curious about who we are.
Reflection: What do you like to do? How do you like to be treated? What are your goals? What do you believe?
LOVE YOURSELF– We do this through COMPASSION, accepting imperfections & mistakes, self care & Self-love, being kind to yourself, instead of being critical about your flaws. Self-love is your basic physical need, getting sleep, eating healthy food, exercise, taking medications your doctor has prescribed, setting boundaries, your opinions, asking for what you need, making time for fun, social connection. If you’re not used to taking care of yourself, it will feel uncomfortable for a while, but with each step of compassion, self-care, you are taking solid steps to love yourself.
Reflection: What is one thing you can do for your emotional health everyday? What is one thing you can do for your physical health everyday? What are you saying to yourself when you make mistakes? What can you tell yourself that would be understanding, supportive & compassionate?
Concentration meditation Our consciousness focus on a object or subject and breathing deeply, this helps form mental acuity, focus, and application. It helps in overcoming distraction & will build patience.
Open awareness Meditation encourages us to observe, be present in the consciousness at the moment, resting in awareness without boundary or guidance.
Open-awareness meditation is the metaphor of the mind being an open sky.
Mindfulness Meditation is about focus but to remain aware, aware of sensory & perception, as well as emotion & thought, accepting of our entire experience.
Sit or lie comfortably on a chair, cushion, Playlist calming sounds, music or silence, etc
Close your eyes
Simply breathe naturally.
Be clear on your motivation for meditating
Take it one day at a time
Stay mindful after meditations on daily basis
Meditation is a journey of a lifetime, be confident about what you’re doing & explore your different areas and emotions of life.
All meditations are simply different, Its Fascinating to explore these ancient practices, it’s worth pursuing.
Reading- 4 Cards
by Apostle Gabriel Cross This is the time. This is the season. Although, there has been a struggle, mishaps, strong disappointments, and some yet to see results, I am reassuring your faith, in this hour. I am refurbishing and recovering what you have lost. You will have greater than what you had before. And so […]